sometimes I want to leave here so bad and discover other places I feel I might go crazy; but I'm scared to leave the life that I've built here.


but is the life I built here better, then what I might discover out there?

horrible...

I have realized I am a horrible judge of age!! There are people here are work that I can not believe how old they are because they do not look that old!!! After I find out their age I guess I can kind of see it but man, for some of these people I don't think they look nearly as old as they are. Wait, that came out kinda rude. What I mean is they look damn good for their age!


"How come all the cute boys keep getting younger and younger and I don't age one bit?!" - Lea

this isn't going as planned.....at all!

So I'm beginning to wonder if this whole life I had imagined in GB is really going to happen. I wanted this job so bad and now I'm kind of contemplating it. I love it, I really do and it's what I wanted to do but the rest of my life isn't turning out quite like I had expected! My future 'roommate' (or the girl who was suppose to be my roommate) can't get a job in GB so she is going to move back home since her lease is up June 1st. Well that leaves me living alone, which I don't really want to do; and it leaves me with a huge a*# rent bill I have to pay all on my own. The cheapest rent I can find for a decent place is like $650.00. That's almost two weeks of pay on what I bring home.

I don't know what I expected to happen but more and more I'm thinking I need to leave WI and go travel somewhere else. Sometimes I want to leave here so bad I feel like I'm going to burst out of my skin. And other times I'm so content I can't see myself anywhere else. I want to travel the U.S. and visit other places to see if WI is really right for me. What if Oregon is right? Or Wyoming? Or Ohio? How will I ever know if I don't try other things out?

Maybe I have this impossible dream in my head that I have made that could never come true. I don't know why I can't just be all around happy. A great deal of it is because I feel so alone sometimes. I wish I could just be happy by myself and deal with life. I guess things just aren't working out like I thought they would and it sucks. I don't want to live alone....I like people. Something needs to change here or I might lose it all.

Happy Easter!

Hello Everyone!! Just wanted to wish you a Happy Easter before the weekend! Celebrate with family and friends and eat lots of jello eggs! ha ha....did you ever eat those? we used to make them all the time and they were gross, yet so good! Ohh how I miss those jello jiggler easter eggs!

Sarah Johns

It's Hard To Be A Girl....

I don't mean to appear too forward.
Then again I wanna say so much.
I don't want to scare him off,
cause we're off to such a good start...
such a good start.

So I don't think I'll even leave a message.
He's had my number all along.
And if he hasn't got the message by now,
as to what this girl wants, what my heart wants...

I've been known to speak my mind,
but with him I melt, forget every line.
It's hard to be a girl in a young man's world.

I can't think straight, I'm confused.
This dress don't go with these shoes.
What's wrong with me?
Am I were he wants to be?
Should I go to work or go back to bed?
Pull the covers over my head, and scream?

I've been known, to speak my mind.
But with him I melt, forget every line.
It's hard to be a girl in a young man's world.
Ohh it's hard to be a girl, in a young man's world.


*If you like country....or even if you don't, give Sarah Johns a try. She's really great and co-wrote every song on her album!

will i...

will i ever be the one included in on the secrets? the one who people turn to to tell their frustrations or the one to help others out? will people ever bring their good news to me? will i ever be one of the girls in this office? it stinks when people yell over the cubicle to one another, asking if everyone is in and your gets bypassed. i know it's only been a couple months but when will my inclusion time come....or will i never be able to catch up to it?

it just comes natural

Sometimes I get really upset that I'm not naturally beautiful like some people. I have to struggle with weight and self-confidence probably more then the average girl. It sucks when you see these girls who I believe are pretty dang close to perfect and they complain about this and that. I just want to shake them and say "you have no idea how lucky you are"

I realize to them they are not perfect but jeez, how could you look in the mirror and think that? I often think that if I did change, I would be happy....but would I? Or would I be just like that girl who everyone thinks is well on her way to perfect but to her, she's far from it?

This comes on the heals of seeing the most gorgeous guy ever. And I think....my God, he is so attractive and in the back of my mind, I know I'll never stand a chance to get a look from this guy. I'm not the natural beauty he looks for. I'm the girl who "she's kind of pretty" and that's it. No second glance or smile and a hello. I just get so pissed because of this and I don't know how to just stop! It sometimes consumes my thoughts and lately it's been really bad. I need to just be content with who I am or change myself. If only 'changing myself' was easy and not so dang hard.

why aren't you gone yet??

Sometimes I get really, really frustrated with this job. I understand that the girl who had this position before me was here for along time. *Pam had my position for 6 or 7 years and it's only two people in our department. Ok, I understand that you got close over the years since it' s just you two but now I have your position, you can leave now. Pam just keeps hanging around and granted, it has been helpful when certain situations arrive and I need to get the answer to a question. But when I keep hearing that Pam did this and Pam got asked to stay by the boss and Pam did it this way.....ok good for Pam. I'M NOT PAM!!!!!

It's so frustrating to have her constantly here! Sometimes I wonder if my boss wishes Pam was still here and she is kind of upset that I am here instead of Pam. I'm sorry that you feel that way but you have to understand we have only known each other for about a month and a half....not nearly long enough to get extremely comfortable with each other. My boss and Pam just left for a day at the spa....wow, thanks for inviting me. It hurts when she goes off with Pam and leaves me here. Sometimes in this workplace I feel so alone and sometimes it's great. Lots of people know each other b/c they've been working together for years and I'm the new girl they don't really know yet. And the age thing plays into it as well I think. Everyone here is in their upper 20's to early/mid 30's. I'm 23. They have babies and husbands and bills...I'm just getting my life started! I feel like I don't fit in a lot. Not that they don't make an effort to include me but when your boss goes off with Pam and you are left in the office, it kind of stings. Sometimes I just want to say to Pam, GO AWAY!!! YOU DON'T WORK HERE ANYMORE!!! But I know that she'll be here later in the week, or possibly this weekend.

Will I ever be able to 'replace' her or am I constantly going to be taking a backseat to Pam? Is she always going to be around and overshadow me or will people ever start to know me for me and not "the new Pam"?

the end of an era.....

Today is a sad day in Wisconsin athletic history. Today, you said goodbye to the game you made famous. Everyone who knows anything about football knows your name associated with an indescribable feat. You risked it all and took the route not traveled, the sacrifice dive, or the famous "hail-mary" pass. Often coming out on top, victorious. You took challenges and risks and no matter what happened, we were behind you all the way. You Mr. Favre, were our shining light. Our hopes, dreams, and secret goals lived through you. Each of us threw a ball hoping some day it would leave our hand with the power like yours...never did, it but we wished it all the same. Tears were brought to our eyes during many games. The way you and the team poured their hearts out on the field; leaving tired and bruised. The night you played the game after your fathers death made many of question whether you were best friends with God. Your adversity to overcome obstacles has been outstanding. Our hearts went out to you and your family. To them you may be just an average guy who happens to have a heck of an arm. To us, you're our hero.

You showed children that football is fun. No matter how much money you have made from start to finish, you have given it one hundred percent. Your smile on the field has made us smile in our homes. The way you celebrate touchdowns like it's your first one ever. You ran around with you helmet in your hand raised above your head, showing the world what great things were to come. The way you pat players on the backs, give them a wink, crack a joke, or snap a towel you do it all with vigor. You have adopted Green Bay as your second home and we have adopted you as our second son. Through thick and thin, we have stood by you and you by us. Your devotion to the green and gold has almost out shined your best plays. Green Bay has changed since you have arrived here some sixteen years ago. You gave us something to look forward to in the fall and a reason for us to enjoy the winter. Families planned their vacations around Green Bay now, hoping to catch a glimpse of the "great one" during practice. The game will never be the same without you in it. Many have said you're so modest and kind and that's what makes you loved. Not a single player has spoke negative words about you which says even more about you then your gunslinging arm.

We first saw a fierce football player. Little by little the layers came away and we see now a great man as well. Your private life has become more in the public eye then maybe you have wanted, but with your disclosure of your private life, you have lifted many others up. Your fight with addiction helped others get back on track. Deanna's fight with breast cancer showed others that life is worth fighting for. Money and fame have not gone to Deanna's or your head. This shows a lot about your roots and family upbringing. You taught our children how to behave off the field as well as on. Tell your family thank you from us as you spend your upcoming years with them. They have been patiently waiting for you.

Your family has continued to donate their time, faith, and love to children to brighten their day. Little did we know it also brightens yours. We see you on a pedestal...you see yourself as an average guy. Neither of us are right, but we can't say neither is wrong as well. How could we have known a boy from Mississippi could turn into a magnificent man right before our eyes? You fit in better in Wisconsin with your hospitality and charm then even some Wisconsinites do. You have stayed true to yourself and also honest with us, which makes us even more proud to call you 'ours.'

Great days are ahead of us. When Lambeau Field adds your number to the retired jersey's of legends hanging on their sacred walls; and the day you are forever recognized as a record breaking quarterback in the National Football Hall of Fame. Both are well deserved and you have worked so hard to earn the titles.

We are all preparing on how to tell our children of the days we watched the great Brett Favre make the incredible pass and then pat his teammates on the back. The joy you had as you ran around the field, celebrating every play from year number one to year seventeen. We will teach them to be like you, more then we will ask them to mirror us.

We're sorry we often got carried away and didn't let you live your life outside of football. Sometimes we get so caught up, we forget there is more to you then your football legacy. Even though some say it, you don't owe us anything. You already made it seventeen years longer then some pets, some jobs, and some loves. We knew you'd be there for us year after year and for that we're happy. It's great to have "known" you for so long and like all good things, this must come to an end too. We wish you well. Have fun hunting, spending time with family and friends, and when football season comes around, we'll all be thinking of you.

We'll forever remember the day this announcement was made. You may think you don't deserve it, to us you couldn't deserve more. There's not much we can say Mr. Favre to tell you how much you have impacted all of our lives. Most for better, other NFL fans for worse. From now on, most of us when given a choice to choose a number will choose number four; knowing in the back of our minds that if forever belongs to you. Thank you for your heart, your dedication to Green Bay and the fans, and your love for life. On the field and off you have helped many of us see the joys in life. You will forever be Deanna's Brett...and forever in our hearts, our Favre.



"But I firmly believe that any man's finest hour, his greatest fulfillment of all he holds dear, is the moment when he has worked his heart out in a good cause and lies exhausted on the field of battle - victorious." - Vince Lombardi